Progressives on the left were shocked today when Trump revealed that his primary reason for building a massive wall on our southern border was environmental, and had little to do with the race of those illegally entering the country. In making his announcement Trump referred to a recent study done by S.H.I.T. Sam Houston Institute of Technology---one of the nations most prestigious Universities. It appears that a majority of the professors at S.H.I.T. have concluded that the greenhouse gas emissions coming from the massive numbers of bean-eaters coming in from the south each year was equal to the annual construction of 5 coal burning power plants. It seems that bean-eaters fart 4 times as often as normal Big Mac consumers. Therefore, according to Donald Trump the wall is absolutely necessary in order to prevent a looming environment disaster. A disaster that could easily be avoided, by stopping the massive influx of farting aliens from the south. However, Trump would let some of these "greenhouse producing units" into the country provided they pay a $10,000 tariff at the border which would be used to purchase Carbon Credits! Credits that would be used to pay for the clean up of their stinking pollutants. While also providing funds to change the unhealthy eating habits of the bean-bellies already in the country----both legal and illegal. By Ron Russell
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