Lawyer vs. Hooker

Was coming out of my attorney's office today, went there to take care of what I believed to be a relatively trivial matter.  Was I shocked when he told me his fee would be about $5000.00.  After returning home, I remembered these old lawyer jokes from years ago---damn they are fitting.   

Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and a hooker? 

A: A hooker will stop trying to screw you once you're dead.

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Q: Do you know why God made lawyers before he make snakes?

A: He needed the practice!

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Damn, if you need a good screwing forget the hooker and go to a lawyer's office.  That's how I feel tonight!