TOP SCIENTIST AT S.H.I.T. (SAM HOUSTON INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLOGY HAVE REVEALED THAT RECENT MEASUREMENTS OF THE EARTH'S CIRCUMSTANCE AT THE EQUATOR HAVE CONFIRMED WHAT MANY HAVE LONG SUSPECTED. THE EARTH IS EXPANDING. EVERY SCHOOL BOY KNOWS THAT AS AN OBJECT HEATS UP IT EXPANDS. THE OLD MEASUREMENTS AT THE EQUATOR OF 24,900 MILES HAS NOW INCREASED TO 24,001.55 MILES AND GROWING AT AN ALARMING RATE. FURTHERMORE THE DISTANCE FROM WASHINGTON D.C. TO MOSCOW HAS INCREASED FROM 4,860 TO 4,860.16 MILES CAUSING LEADERS AT THE PENTAGON TO TWEAK THE GUIDANCE SYSTEMS OF OUR ICBM'S.
HOWEVER A WHISTLE-BLOWER AT THE BUREAU OF WEIGHTS AND MEASUREMENT STANDARDS HAS REPORTED THAT UNAUTHORIZED INDIVIDUALS HAVE BEEN SEEN ENTERING AND LEAVING THE BUILDING HOUSING THESE HIGHLY CALIBRATED MEASUREMENT INSTRUMENTS AT UNUSUAL HOURS. LEAVING SOME TO SPECULATE THAT SOMEONE IN THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION WAS FUDGING THE NUMBERS TO FIT THEIR GLOBAL WARMING AGENDA!
by Ron Russell
Also posted at Right Wing Humor
Bwahahahahahahahaha. Oh the horror of all this.
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